no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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