We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize