clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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