would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
