i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
