Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
