ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize