I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize