I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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