and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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