We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
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