Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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