all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
it's like iHOP with fire
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
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