i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
