This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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