My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Randomize
