My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Randomize
