We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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