Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Boobs are out for the taking
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
