He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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