either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
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It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize