Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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