I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
