remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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