I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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