The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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