Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
