i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Randomize