put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Found the puke drawer
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Randomize
