We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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