I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize