The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize