i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
