I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
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I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
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We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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