I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Omg I joined a choir last night...
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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