Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
