I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
one two three fourrrrnication!
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.