waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
He shit in the fireplace
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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