I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
What a fucking waste of an outfit
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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