There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
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