mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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