Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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