fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Still dying that you shit outside
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Randomize
