I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Just invented taco cereal.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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