I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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