Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
