absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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