All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
