I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
