i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize